You may use this spot to share your ode with others in the class. This is your spot for collaboration. Responses from this blogsot can be used for the Poet's Voice Sheet.
You may use this spot to share your ode with others in the class. This is your spot for collaboration. Responses from this blogsot can be used for the Poet's Voice Sheet.
Did you notice that you have a "muse" on this page? Press play on the Voki above:) I hope this resource link is helpful to all of you.
ReplyDeleteI'm having trouble trying to find the tragic beauty part and incorporating it into my ode!! How do you find that sort of stuff?
ReplyDeleteJeff. It has to do with the catharsis aspect. Look to your handouts from Oedipus. That should help:)
ReplyDeleteI am having trouble starting my ode. I do not know if each of my stanzas should be one of the aspects of a tragic hero or if I should organize it a different way. My title is Ode to Depression and my tragic hero is Heath Ledger. I have started my ode with:
ReplyDeleteMy expertise in the game of knights and kings of old / nor my craftiness on high platforms / has prepared me for this unrelenting cold / or saved me from my own internal storm.
Those are my first 2 lines. Good? Bad?
Natalie I think she wants you to organize it like the hand out we got.
ReplyDeleteGoodness
Appropriateness
Lifelike
Consistency
She kept mentioning that there were 4 categories and 4 stanzas to write so I assumed that each stanzas should be one of those aspects.
Does that help? I apologize if it doesn't. Ha.
Okay, here is my ode. I really hope it's good... Please leave any comments that you have for me and I'll work on fixing and adjusting the ode. :)
ReplyDeleteOde to Steve Irwin
1 Steve Irwin dedicated himself to good,
working to protect all animals’ lives
And doing everything that he could
To help each and every one thrive.
5 This meant missing time spent as a father
Working long hours to reach his aspiration
While seeing the fruits of his hard toil
And eliminating a fearful pother
To bring the imminent salvation
10 Of crocodiles in pure turmoil.
11 Growing up with wildlife experts,
Steve Irwin grew to be the same.
As a child the same passion he exerted
Fulfilled the history of his surname.
15 He was surrounded by exotic critters
And fought a croc at the age of nine
With supreme Herculean might.
He was taught not to be a quitter
But to provide an essential lifeline
20 For animals even in the face of plight.
21 While he came to trust all wild beasts,
Steve met his fatal fate in the reef.
He was not afraid in the least
But his death came like a thief.
25 He swam too close to the threatened ray
Who in its terror swung its barbaric barb
Straight into his unguarded chest.
Instead of being the savior, Steve was the prey.
He passed from life’s glory to Death’s sad garb
30 And only his legacy was left to manifest.
31 Always hardworking, always enthusiastic,
Steve displayed an exceptional amount of heart,
His passions so strong it was fantastic.
He was always happy to impart
35 How to aid the creatures for which he cared,
And up until his very last heartbeat,
He worked to each and every crocodile.
He himself was never prepared
To end a life so frightfully incomplete.
40 The Crocodile Hunter, in death so volatile.
Yes that helped :) i have changed a few things around to make it easier to read and shortened a few of my lines. Im also going to move those first couple of lines to the lifelike stanza. thanks :)
ReplyDeleteKelsey,
ReplyDeleteI love your ode. But maybe instead of the title being Ode to Steve Irwin it's something more original and crafty.
Like maybe Ode to Passion... It was his passion that made him infamous and his passion that killed him. I don't knoww. Haha. Just a thought.
Thanks, Kaela! Yeah, I was kinda stumped with the title. I'll definitely think of something more individual. :)
ReplyDeleteWord from the muse: Make sure that you comment about WORD CHOICE and LITERARY DEVICE usage. Remember, this is the "push" on the assignment. Elevated vocabulary and understanding/use of device are very important.
ReplyDeleteI hope this makes sense to people unfamiliar with Star Trek, please comment!
ReplyDelete“Ode to Honor” by Nicole Ward
1 The very blood of Ares dwells within the great
Klingons, a race in which honor is key.
Death is to be celebrated, not grieved, and fate
Graces honorable deaths with a place in the
5 Afterlife. As with the Norse heroes, to die
With honor is sought. Loyalty to the society
Is expected, but Worf, a cultural oddity, serves
The Star Trek Enterprise. People can always rely
On this faithful and trustworthy comrade without anxiety.
10 However, at all costs, pride is preserved.
11 As a true Klingon, Worf holds loyalty and honor
Above all else. Although not to his native home,
His allegiance to the Enterprise is full of ardor.
Worf acknowledges his heritage with the chrome
15 Belt across his chest, of nearly Hephaestian style.
Despite being reared by humans, Worf, has held on
To the culture of his people. This Star Fleet
Captain is respected by all comrades for his wile
And bravery in action. The warlike Klingon
20 Makes a superior solider and is difficult to beat.
21 Besides the characteristic cold, emotionless exterior,
With eclipsian rarity, he shows evidence of a childhood
Around humans. An accident renders his legs inferior,
And refusing to live crippled, Worf decides he would
25 Rather die. His son Alexander is horrified by this,
But thankfully a surgery kept this man from ending
His own life. This captain takes great pride
In his role on the Enterprise, but pride amiss
Is often his undoing. His utterly unbending
30 Honor hurts those that to him are tied.
31 His constant companion is conceit. No
Matter who is involved or what is at stake,
Pride is upheld. Even for Alex, there is little show
Of love. When Worf’s legs would not wake,
35 Honor was retained and not a single bit
Of Dignity was lost. Not even his mourning
Son could rattle this determined control.
Besides the ferocious tribble that will never quit,
The enemy of Worf is his pride. Without warning
40 This places on his loved ones a sad tole.
So this is a rough draft of my first stanza:
ReplyDeleteOde to Self-Absorption
Lebron James, through hard work and sheer dedication,/
Rose to basketball prominence and fame./
Never taking a day off, winning every fan’s adoration,/
He has the ability to dominate any game./
Through the immense talent he possesses,/
Lebron is prone to egotistical actions/
And elevating himself above the sport./
Sharing Icarus’s and Niobe’s shame and excesses/
Often garnering very negative reactions/
Lebron is the self-proclaimed King of the Court.
any suggestions?
Kevin, I really like this first stanza! It was extremely easy to read (because it flowed nicely). The vocabulary is also nice too, and I like the metaphor (it is a metaphor right?) at the end of the stanza.
ReplyDeleteThe devices in my ode are syzygy, alliteration, personification, foreshadowing, and allusion.
Kelsey-
ReplyDeleteThanks. I didn't intend it to be a metaphor but now that you say it I realize it is
Kevin, your poem has great diction, and the allusion to Icarus and Niobe works perfectly. The whole reaching too far thing is seen in almost everything we've read this year, so it's really cool that you could make a connection to the present. I think you're off to a great start!
ReplyDeleteNicole-
ReplyDeleteI really liked the complex vocabulary you used in your poem and how clearly it is written. Even though I know nothing about Star Trek, I still felt like I understood your poem
Here is my entire rough draft:
ReplyDeleteOde to Self-Absorption
Lebron James, through hard work and sheer dedication,
Rose to basketball prominence and fame.
Never taking a day off, winning every fan’s adoration,
He has the ability to dominate any game.
Through the immense talent he possesses,
Lebron is prone to egotistical actions
And elevating himself above the sport.
Sharing Icarus’s and Arachne’s shame and excesses
Often garnering very negative reactions
Lebron is the self-proclaimed King of the Court.
Devoted to the game from a young age,
Lebron’s talents grew each and every day.
Between scouts and coaches proclaiming his future like a sage,
Mere dreams and fantasies became realities, leading his ego astray.
In the world of media exposure and superstar worship,
He followed the path of Niobe, calling for respect
To be delegated to him over the game.
In today’s society, in which athletes exhibit leadership,
Lebron allowed his success to go unchecked
And, like so many other superstars, admired himself without shame.
By “taking his talents to South Beach”
Lebron proved himself to be conceited,
Thinking of himself before others, a serious breech
In the heroic code that must be heeded.
No match on the moral scale with the likes of
Theseus or Perseus, great heroes of old,
Lebron’s destructive deficiency brings the derision of all.
Nicknamed The King out of self-love
Lebron’s talents and pride are a combination to behold.
If left to grow unchecked, his ego could cause his fall.
Talented from his first days in the sport,
Lebron has been praised since high school.
Supporting this recognition with outstanding play on the court,
Lebron allowed his arrogance to rule.
Driving fancy cars with personalized “king james”
Headrests, Lebron has been self-absorbed throughout his career.
Leaving the adoration and respect of his many fans
Is simply the latest action to show his self-promoted aims.
If he continues on this path, the penalty will be severe
A fall from grace is surely not in this star’s plans.
Hopefully you all like it
This is my first stanza feel free to help me make it better any way you see fit.
ReplyDeleteOde to a Devastating Love
Mike Tyson, king of the boxing ring,
He ruled it like David.
And just like him, he felt a woman’s sting,
Love hit him hard, like a face to the pavement.
The soft-spoken champion,
Fans never thought he would taste defeat.
Was confident with Herculean strength,
Yet suffered misfortune like Samson.
The humble warrior’s love for the wicked woman made him possible to beat.
Still he has a career and a resume with impressive length.
Kevin, your whole poem is really, really good! I really enjoyed reading it. The allusions in it make it especially good because we can relate Lebron to many characters from Greek mythology. Really good job!
ReplyDeletePat, I really like the Bible allusions. It's just another place to pull from to connect Mike Tyson with other characters. I'm kind of confused by the last line though. It seems sort of out of place.
yeah i really just didn't know how to end it so i just threw it in there. do you have idea what i could use instead?
ReplyDeleteFlint, I think you could focus on flowing sentences more. Instead of "king of the boxing ring, he ruled" maybe "king of the boxing ring, ruled as ___ly as David". I do like that biblical allusion. And then maybe add "he" to line 8, because "was confident" isn't really the start of a sentence. I'm not sure who this wicked woman is, but the alliteration and choice of adjective has definitely caught my interest.
ReplyDeleteFlint, about your last line. You could connect back to him being the king and say something like he still remained on top for an impressive length.
ReplyDeleteI like those ideas a lot thank you.
ReplyDeletethis is still a rough draft and i'm going to put literary devices and better choice into it, but here's what i have so far:
ReplyDeleteTaking the stage by storm
As Terpsikhore’s gift begins to show,
All the rhythmic nymphs stand behind in form
While his voice alone compares to that of Apollo.
He was a friend of clean air and wood,
Teaching his followers of a world more lovelier
And giving his earthly riches to this noble cause.
But although he tried to do good
Regarding his children and professional carrier,
His decisions would make many mortals stop and pause.
Just like Atlas who is ancient by birth,
This powerfully driven king of pop
Felt upon his shoulders the weight of the Earth,
Thinking constantly that the pain never will stop.
But unlike Atlas, he was not a titan,
But a mortal who has personal borders
And cannot live day by day in pain.
And through this reality his downfall began,
For the stress and pressure from his managers
And devotees drove this star to what he became.
As shown by kings of the past,
Stress and pain backs the sovereign into a corner,
And when the ruler breaks at last,
The empire turns around the natural order.
For this king, he had no answer for his problem
coping with pain and not being able to sleep
So he went to drugs for everything.
He became addicted and they took over him.
But still the everlasting pain was sinking deep.
And so the talented yet troubled celebrity stopped living.
This former emperor had never been anything more or less.
For everyday he breathed he pushed himself over the top
And everyday he’d abuse the poison for happiness.
Once he started, he could never stop.
No matter where he went, he was known.
And even in death, his songs will live on
And through his voice he will also live and shine.
So although the tragic ending of his life is easily shown
Through the poison in his life that now is gone,
His legacy will never be forgotten, regardless of time.
Is the structure and content right, even though it sounds really bad right now?
patrick, i don't know if this is right or not, but i think the first stanza is supposed to be about the person's goodness, not tragic downfall. this might be better for your 2nd stanza, but i don't know where you're going with your ode so it might fit better being the first stanza. other than that it was good and i agree with nicole
ReplyDeleteSome of you seem stuck on allusions. Remember, unlike the writers of old, you have literary allusions to pull from OTHER than mythological and biblical. What about Ahab and his megalomania for instance; is it possible that those exhibiting huris could be compared to this? Perhaps an actress could be compared to Alice's travels through the looking glass... You have options. That being said, I like where this is going. I see the BALANCE, the human aspect, necessary for the FORM of an ode. Also, your responses are where they need to be. You analysis is DEEP and specific to device and word choice, brining the ode to the AP level. Good work:) Keep going:)
ReplyDeleteHi guys! Oh geez, this is probably terrible. I'm having a difficult time including good devices since we had to write the ode about a PERSON, I find myself turning far too much to facts, and it's a lot more difficult to add devices to political events. So I'd be really thankful if you guys have any suggestions!
ReplyDeleteOde to Ardor
Humble beginnings fostered compassion
And Bill began to make national law.
As Governor, empathetic fashion
Lead him to address things the public saw.
Clinton assumed presidential status
And pursuance of perfection reformed.
Although his passion kindled the country,
Venus made him faithless.
When ruling his eye was keen and focused,
In private matters, he acted blindly.
Clinton unwisely acted on a whim,
But he always had the best intentions.
Strides in the Middle East were made by him;
The nation needed his intervention.
Clinton worked proudly; he was well prepared.
He drastically decreased unemployment;
He improved government efficiency.
Bill genuinely cared.
Helping his nation gave him enjoyment;
He listened to his constituency.
Bill was flawed with this unyielding passion.
His downfall was how ardent he could be.
Like Zeus, he was tempted and craved some fun,
And found satisfaction in Ms. Lewinsky.
This once proud and respected president
Found himself shamed, embarrassed, and impeached.
Bill’s perfectly human inclinations
Created malcontent.
The case left Bill’s second term somewhat beached.
After his terms, he still served the nation.
Mr. Clinton’s compassion is still used.
He went (like Sigurd released Brynhild)
To save journalists Korea abused.
Clinton helped organize Haiti’s rebuild,
And the man supports clean, green, energy.
He has always been heavily involved
In America’s national problems.
We owe such a figure of the century
Thanks for how he has helped the US evolve
Despite the scandal that seemed to end him.
Here is my rough draft. again feel free to help me out and give me as much feedback as you see fit.
ReplyDeleteOde to a Devastating Love
Mike Tyson, king of the boxing ring,
He ruled as greatly as David.
And just like him, he felt a woman’s sting,
Love hit him hard, like a face to the pavement.
The soft-spoken champion,
Fans never thought he would taste defeat.
He was confident with Herculean strength,
Yet suffered misfortune like Samson.
The humble warrior’s love for the wicked woman made him possible to beat.
Still he remained the sport’s king for a Hall of Fame worthy length.
He was only 20 years old, the youngest champion ever,
Iron Mike Tyson truly lived up to his name.
To be like him was everyone’s endeavor,
But truthfully, never was anyone else the same.
He was at all the important places and was definitely a big deal,
Tyson’s fame was growing like a weed and people were taking notice.
He couldn’t hide anything he was doing; he was in the limelight,
Privacy for him was non-existent, but for a kid on top this life was surreal.
Soon the money and fame, the source of his joy, became like locus,
The woman that it all brought stopped the king of the ring’s flight.
Mike Tyson loved Robin Givens,
Yet she with the cunning like the serpent hid the fact that she loved money.
Proof that any woman can take down even the strongest of men,
She defiled his career as the harpies can even the sweetest of honey.
Powerful, punches he would rain down on ill-fated adversary,
But like the plotting Prometheus she stole his fire, and doused other fighter’s fears.
Iron Mike Tyson lost it all,
To his most fearsome opponent, the one he married.
His fall was quick and hard like a lose chandelier,
And as his career faded fast he sees how his wife played with him like a doll.
After losing his composure and falling from grace,
He has returned to the humble man he used to be.
Mike Tyson after losing it all is back with a symbol on his face
Reminding him of the man we used to see.
He’s back but with a new wisdom still ready to fight
Any one who is daring enough to challenge him.
This time staying within his boundaries and not over-reaching for money and fame,
But now he has a balance between the simple life and the limelight.
In and out of the news no more, it’s about his family and only them.
His return to the ring was less than impressive but Tyson before dominated the game.
Mrs. Edwards or anyone who knows-
ReplyDeleteIs there a specific syllable pattern we need to follow?
Ode to Perfection
ReplyDeleteHer beauty shone like the diamonds in her crown,
Reflecting a pure and radiant light.
From royal birth and great renown
Came the gentle princess-- the world’s delight
Sacrificing to help both the sick and the weak,
Diana’s compassion was clear.
When she was needed, she answered their call
Adding to her noble mystique.
Young yet strong, shy yet sincere,
The perfect princess-- The pride of all.
Fit to be wife, mother, and queen
Because of her purity and youth,
But hidden pressures went unseen
As she battled to cope with the truth.
Depth of love from her Jason, Prince Charles, she lacked
And like Medea, Di felt so alone.
Great expectations weighed on her shoulder.
But she was not Atlas, her foundations had cracked,
A perfect princess, but maybe not fit for the throne,
As their love grew colder and colder.
And as the walls closed in from every side,
It was plain she was losing control.
Under such pressure, her perfection and pride
Soon took their treacherous toll.
Into a realm of depression she fell,
And through food sought the control she craved.
Falling faster and faster to her lowest state,
Then to her marriage—A final farewell.
But through this break, perhaps Di was saved
From the pressure, the tension the weight.
Kind and giving to the very end,
Despite the challenges Diana faced.
One day the final tragedy did descend,
Such beauty and youth were gone to waste!
The people of the world were filled with grief
And mourned for their Di, their stolen jewel
They had watched her rise and watched her fall
Only to be stolen by Death, the stealthy thief,
Who worked by means both sudden and cruel
To steal the perfect princess—The pride of all.
This is my rough draft, any suggestions?
ReplyDeleteShe said the emphasis is more on the rhyming and not the syllables. She said that she's not supposed to put us in a box by having us try to squeeze ten syllables in each line.
ReplyDeleteKevin. The meter depends upon the model that you chose. If you have trouble determining the meter, google it; a canon selection should come up. If is is Nightengale, it should be in your notes:)
ReplyDeleteSkylar, your content and structure is right on. I really liked the last stanza, which emphasized his immortality. The devices you have so far are good, so other than that: in the 3rd stanza you need to capitalize coping.. line 9: should the last word be career?
ReplyDeleteAudrey, I love how you used Venus in reference to Clinton's infidelity. You also did a good job of summarizing his presidency. I don't think you need parentheses around the allusion to Sigurd. Nice use of assonance with green and clean.
Emily, your choice of words made the poem seem delicate, perfect for a princess. It's amazing how well your allusions to mythology apply to her life. The metaphor of Di as a stolen jewel is great. I really liked it!
Flint, now I understand that the wicked woman is a gold digger. You did a nice job of explaining something I knew nothing about. line 29: lose-loose.
ReplyDeleteI'm still working on my fourth and am trying to put in some devices, but here's what my first three stanzas look like so far:
ReplyDeleteThe hardworking Mel Gibson
Focused intently on his acting
And when that time was done,
put that intense effort to directing.
Always sticking with his beliefs
He learned throughout his childhood
Reflects he will always stand for what is right.
Driven by responsibility to provide relief.
For those who have tried to live the best they could
But need some assistance with the fight.
So similar to Psyche was his being.
The once most handsome man of the year
To the ladies was just so alluring.
His acting and directing could draw a tear
Even from the god of the dead.
His great skills brought him awards and fame,
Along with placing him in the spotlight.
There is always something of him to be said,
Whether of his acts of shame
Or his legendary performances of sheer might.
But there was a curse on Gibson's family
That, like that of Thebes, was forever present.
His struggle with alcoholism damaged him greatly.
The gifts of Bacchus created overwhelming dissent.
So much as a word became a sword
Hacking at his positive reputation.
His religious slanders started his downfall
From a powerful prince to a landless lord.
Now even the rules of his religious organization
Are violated with his every new brawl.
If you have any suggestions, feel free to tell me because I need all the help I can get.
Thanks for the feedback Nicole!
ReplyDeleteThanks for your suggestions, Nicole!
ReplyDeleteEmily: Yours is excellent! I love the air of elegance that your ode eminates. It works well with Princess Di.
Sam: Maybe use 'the' instead of 'his' when you're talking about his beleifs; there are a lot of pronouns in that bit. Also, the line "Reflects he will always stand for what is right" is oddly worded for me. Try switching some words around. I really like your references to Bacchus and the Royal House of Thebes. They are quite fitting!
Sam, you did a great job of summarizing all of Mel Gibson's admirable qualities. Then you "hacked at his positive reputation" with the personification of a sword. I love that you used such a strong, almost gruesome verb to describe the negative aspects of Mel. You have lots of mythological allusions that work really well and a varied vocabulary that enhances your ode.
ReplyDeleteOde to Depression
ReplyDeleteHeath Ledger was an honest man and swift of mind,
He never failed to deliver a spectacular performance.
He recieved awards and gifts of every kind
and to many social events he made an appearance.
His goal was to inspire and entertain,
And he was responsible for his actions,
He made amends when it was necessary.
A warm smile showed the happiness that he could not contain,
and it was as if joy was his sweet addiction.
But all of this was taken from him so suddenly.
A spotlight is like the sun: a beacon of truth yet blisteringly bright,
Healing and destroying man just as Apollo did.
Paparazzi watch for error day and night,
Enjoyment of life these modern day Furies forbid.
All of this stress comes with Hollywood fame,
Photoshoots there and here an interview with a teenage magazine,
Girls all over experienced puppy love: he was their new infatuation.
But like Hercules, Heath was controlled by his shame,
Spiraling downward into the ravine,
Letting his mind and heart weaken.
His ability to strategize checkers and chess,
Nor his skill and talent on stage,
Prepared him for the unrelenting darkness,
Inside his terrible and miserable cage.
The doctor prescribed the wrong remedy,
For his Dark Knight induced depression.
Alas! The Moon never granted him a peaceful sleep,
As she did to preserve Edymion's beauty.
He then wore a painted smile to hide his desolation,
In the end causing the whole world to wail and weep.
Heath Ledger Struggled throughout his life,
With family, personal, and public matters alike.
He eventually succumbed to his own internal strife,
And never recovered from his Furies last strike.
His trademark was total dedication to his movies,
Immersing himself in the life of his character,
And always brave enough to be controversial,
For the roles that he played had many abnormalties.
Completely consumed, Ledger became the Joker,
And in lossing his humanity, depression won Heath's final battle.
Thoughts???
ReplyDeleteokay here goes the first stanza
ReplyDeleteWhitney Houston, like the instinctual newborn sparrow
Started young, her preference for God
Using her musical talents for good wasn’t narrow
Warring apartheid with Mandela earned a nod
Striking features and presence would make Venus jealous
Her personality a considerate match
A non-profit for homeless and infected children
Must have made the philanthropist anxious
Empowering youth and blacks became her new catch
For Gulf War soldiers, a reputable siren
Ode to Pride:
ReplyDeleteO.J Simpson, "The Juice" as he was called
Displayed speed and raw talent
That was new to the game of football.
He was almost like Hercules, so strong and so gallant.
The champion of that great Western field they call Coliseum.
But power is pride as the old stories show;
And pride leads to uncompromising and lofty thoughts.
O.J fancied himself as a modern Zeus,
Whose actions should go unchecked by the commoners below.
But his reckless ideals eventfully brought
A shadow over the name of the great "Mr. Juice”.
What leads a man to face such sadness?
Perhaps numberless spotlights blinded his sight
As Hera with did Hercules when he was plagued with madness.
Indeed, being a star changes one's sense of wrong and right.
Especially when enshrined in the Hall of Fame.
Being placed in a temple where football is religion,
How could O.J not think he was in some way a god?
He was now above man and their ploys to bring blame
To him for his actions. He now had his vision
Of a world that would never place him in front of the justice rod.
Even more deadly than ignorance is anger,
But placed together creates a recipe for disaster.
O.J was human, and could hardly avoid danger.
He enjoyed his life and did not wish for it to end faster.
But pride's place in people's minds can self-destruct the best.
Almost bringing about great Odysseus' ruin at the hands of a Cyclops.
O.J also could have been crushed as well.
Confined in a cell for putting two people to eternal rest.
But he walked; the people's quest for truth was lost.
And O.J's pride remained, ringing as loud as a bell.
As always, Justice prevails.
Mr. Simpson could never learn from mistakes.
With reputation ruined and life so grim and pale.
People wondered why O.J's crime occurred this late.
He always saw himself as a king, the world his pawns.
And his temper was like unto a bull.
No longer is he remember as a god of a game,
But a man who fights even when in the wrong.
Society should take heed and look for lessons to pull,
From the tragic story of a man who continues to define shame.
Natalie-
ReplyDeleteI loveee your last stanza-it really wraps everything up nicely. The only thing that bothered me was in the second stanza when you mention his "shame." I'm confused because he was very successful. I know you described that he was stressed, but it's not clear why he would be shameful in any way. Maybe I'm being too picky. But other than that your ode is awesome!
Emily, I love that you end your ode's first and last stanza with the same repeated line! it sounds so pretty and sad. Your allusions are also really good and you work them into your poem very naturally.
ReplyDeleteHeres a rough draft of my ode:
Ode to Farrah Fawcett
Splendor and youth blessed her every hour/
She, known by all for her godlike radiance/
With generosity Aphrodite lent her beauty’s power/
To seize a nation by her mere presence /
Flashing to fame in public eye/
With a breadth of talent far over and above/
Unseen, cruel insecurity ensnared her mind/
Yet when cameras appeared she’d never shy /
Still beauty alone cannot inspire love/
And death from within she would find/
Ecstatic smile of charismatic girl/
Graceful poses of body molded like clay /
Acting in confidence with a playful hair twirl/
She’d sit still a second and photographers would snap away/
Whatever Charlie said, she would do/
No obstacle could match her drive/
No challenge could evoke fear on her pretty face/
In history she is comparable to few/
And in spotlight she appeared to come alive/
But she, just a girl, trying to fill the emptiness inside/
For all her beauty she stood alone/
Through every trial and triumphed – yet/
Was loneliness a life she must own?/
She lived without love, in Aphrodite’s debt/
For as far as life goes, she never went without/
Except in Cupid’s desperately sought after specialty,/
If you don’t love yourself, no one else will/
So maybe it was a case of little self esteem and much doubt/
Your own true beauty is hardest to see/
Her barren heart she fought to fill/
In later years she would live to die/
A cancerous poison on her inside/
And now in final rest she does lie/
No husband, just romances unfulfilled, to sit by her side/
The gorgeous girl of ages past/
Gone is the golden glimmer of her hair/
Gone are the teeth so shocking white/
And now she waits lonely in a wooden cast/
Where one lies solo, should have been a pair/
She so beautiful, feels the loneliness of endless night./
Ode to Michael Hutchence
ReplyDeleteOh that we could embrace each sunrise
That blesses our hearts with fervent light.
Perhaps if we gazed into those fiery eyes,
We'd obtain a cure to our hapless blight.
The wars that wage and we strive to endure,
He sought to silence with reason and love.
His inspirational purpose rings clear,
Idle intentions are vain as glamor.
Thus once he began, he rose far above,
And he soared into action without fear.
Fame delivered his life to the world,
So personal issues were public matters.
Cameras flashed while stories twisted and twirled.
Hollywood life brings out these mad hatters.
Displays of destruction glittered his name,
Capturing his intake of fool's poison.
Addicted to the life talent provides,
He placed himself in the media's game.
Happiness was fleeting, as a boy's fun
In summer days when freedom subsides.
Intoxication curved his senses,
And lured him to Eden's apple of gold.
As risk grows, desire breaks fences,
Directing to disaster as in stories of old.
This star strove for love, but became a felon,
And though he was chasing a common dream
His heart's wanting made him by one quite loathed.
As Paris stole the beautiful Helen,
Stealing a wife unravels hatred's seam.
To his tainted love he became betrothed.
As a shooting star does take a fast flight,
This man of song did plummet in a blaze.
As Queen Jocasta left a tragic sight,
He too did take his life, but under a haze.
Though he spoke of Carpe Diem in his life,
He chose to escape and dispensed of his own.
Beauty, fortune, and love fell to the dust.
Even the brightest of stars will burn out,
And even in a crowd one can be alone.
I used alliteration, irony, a simile, mythological allusion, biblical allusion, an allusion from literature, and a paradox.
Jake, I really like how clear your opinion of OJ is. The people's quest for truth being lost and a man who defines shame are both really strong phrases. Your obvious stance on the issue solidifies your ode. The spotlights blinding him is great use of personification, and his tragic flaw of thinking he was godlike is really good too.
ReplyDeleteline 9: maybe eventually instead of eventfully, line 13: Hera with did- Hera did with, line 30: loud- loudly, line 37: remember- remembered. I don't think you need a comma after line 39.
I have the first stanza done! I had forgotten how hard it is to come up with literary devices!
ReplyDeleteO! Heaven high, a shooting Star was Born,
With song that moved the world, made Atlas shake.
From glorious, everlasting Muse torn,
Vivacious voice and music could she make.
With pure-hearted lullabies sung from youth,
Her skill and power turned all roads yellow.
As everyone hears, enchantment revives.
Calling it Zeus’ gift is more than the truth.
Such sweet songs sung, both joyous and mellow,
The compel of the spell thrives and survives.
Jeff...are you talking about Judy Garland :D? I like it!
ReplyDeleteAlexis, this was awesome! I only knew vaguely of this subject, and your ode completely explained his fame and the components of his downfall. I like your allusion to Eden in reference to alcohol. All the imagery in your poem was really cool. Things like the cameras flashing, apple of gold, and shooting star all brought pictures to my mind.
ReplyDeleteBrook-
ReplyDeleteThanks for the suggestion and Im glad that you liked it. When i talk about shame in the second stanza it is because he had to have been depressed about something to begin with before he started filming in Dark Knight. I do not know why he was depressed before the movie but his role as the Joker only intensified his depression. Does that make sense?
Alexis-
ReplyDeleteYour ode is amazing! I really liked it you used some vocabulary that I would have never even thought about using. Your ode is put together very nicely and it flows. The only thing I would change is the title. Instead of his name make it an ode to something that he stood for in his lifetime or something that caused him to commit suicide. I don't know much about him so that is all I can give you but other than that I think your ode is really well done.
Alexis. Wasn't he in the band INXS? Excess... Doesn't that sort of stand for his life in general?? Interesting.
ReplyDeleteAnnie. Check your word choice, specifically in stanza one. One of your adjectives is masculine and you have a feminine subject.
ReplyDeleteOde to Discontent
ReplyDeleteTiger Woods, champion of the green,
Always determined to win in the clutch.
The wealthiest athlete ever seen
Guides his putts with the greatest touch.
His dedication and talent – surpassed by none,
His solid stroke esteemed by many;
Both facts he became well aware of.
His ego grew with each event won,
He was entitled, he thought, more than any,
And he soon lost sight of those he loved.
In a lifetime devoted to this stressful sport,
Tiger long kept his focus and composure.
But how long can one keep a calm of this sort
With threatening media exposure?
When a shabby shot made the spectators sigh,
His childish temper was released.
Words of frustration on his lips would shape
As he carelessly let his club fly.
His discontentment was only increased,
And he sought an alternative escape.
Tiger put his arrogance above his wife,
And believed “normal rules did not apply.”
He created for himself a double-life,
As his morals and faith were going awry.
He shared with Zeus a lustful mind,
While seeking bliss in human temptation.
He should have known that with his fame,
Stories of his affairs would soon unwind.
His marriage was left with a fate of damnation,
As the media continued to blacken his name.
Working hard since the age of two,
Tiger continues to prove his determination.
Possessing the talent held only by few,
He hopes for wins to mend his reputation.
Dominating the game since he was a boy
He has known nothing but pride.
His mistake will surely provide insight,
And further success he may soon enjoy.
But if the lesson he learned is not soon applied,
This star may never shine quite so bright.
Overall: Titles that are creative and reflect an attribute, rather than a name, are better choices. Also, watch your end punctuation; make sure that it makes sense, reflecting intended cadence and flow of the piece.
ReplyDeleteYep!
ReplyDeleteCan anyone think of a mythological figure that was weak to love? (or any literary figure actually)
Zeus maybe? He fell in love with almost every young girl that he saw so maybe he could not resist it. Hope that helps a little.
ReplyDeleteBrooke: If it is destructive love, what about Desdemona or Ophelia? Echo?
ReplyDeleteso if you use Nightengale as your model for rhyme scheme does your poem have to have about 10 syllables a line too?
ReplyDeleteThanks Nicole and Audrey! That helps a lot. I'll definitely work on my pronoun usage and tweak that sentence a bit. Here's my full ode on Mel Gibson:
ReplyDeleteThe hardworking Mel Gibson
Focused intently on his acting
And when that time was done,
put that intense effort to directing.
Always sticking with the beliefs
He learned throughout his childhood Reflects he will defend his view of what is right.
Driven by responsibility to provide relief.
For those who have tried to live the best they could
But need some assistance with the fight.
So similar to Psyche was his being.
The once most handsome man of the year
To the ladies was just so alluring.
His acting and directing could draw a tear
Even from the god of the dead.
His great skills brought him awards and fame,
Along with placing him in the spotlight.
There is always something of him to be said,
Whether of his acts of shame
Or his legendary performances of sheer might.
But there was a curse on Gibson's family
That, like that of Thebes, was forever present.
His struggle with alcoholism damaged him greatly.
The gifts of Bacchus created overwhelming dissent.
So much as a word became a sword
Hacking at his positive reputation.
His religious slanders started his downfall
From a powerful prince to a landless lord.
Now even the rules of his religious organization
Are violated with his every new brawl.
THe destruction of his prized castle in the sand
Defiles his saintly name with every wave
Of compounding woes from a before welcoming land.
The blessed drink creates another rant or rave,
Repeatedly inflaming his accursed Achilles heal.
Fate seems to have repeatedly beat him with its fist
But he tries to battle his affliction
To save himself from what is surreal.
Admitting the transgressions is always accomplished,
Showing the glimmer of hope for his disposition.
My last paragraph probably needs the most help, but tell me if you don't like anything, even if it's just one word.
We don't have to focus on the syllables, so don't worry about that Annie.
ReplyDeleteAnd Annie I love your poem! I love your last stanza especially. Your word choice is so perfect that it makes the reader feel so much emotion as they read it. Great job!
ReplyDeleteThanks Natalie and Mrs. E!
ReplyDeleteMedea would be a good example of destructive love, correct?
Sam
ReplyDeleteI really like your connection with Psyche and Mel Gibson! And I think your last stanza is in really good shape.
Thanks Joe! I think yours sounds good so far too, especially in your reference to Camelot. The only suggestion I have is to maybe try to add some fancier vocab or a few adjectives.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the help Sam!
ReplyDeleteHere it goes..
ReplyDeleteOde to Whitney Houston
Whitney Houston, like the instinctual newborn sparrow,
started young, her preference for God
Using her musical talents for good wasn’t narrow
Warring apartheid with Mandela earned a nod
Striking features and presence would make Venus jealous
Her personality a considerate match
A non-profit for homeless and infected children
must have made the philanthropist anxious
Empowering youth and blacks became her new catch
For Gulf War soldiers, a reputable siren
Continuing a legacy of prominent stars
(Her mother, cousins, and godmother, Aretha)
Whitney’s goal to reach platinum was not very far
Establishing an enduring culture like Siddhartha
The acclaimed artist accomplished album after album
Impressive status always follows skill
Soon she stepped up to the silver screen
But her prosperity soon left her numb
Like many, her distressing marriage drove her downhill
Emotional defilement degraded the queen
Like the forlorn Medea, she was powerless to love
Incapable of detaching from Bobby’s control
His words dismantled her, astray flew the promising dove
That’s when drugs began to take their toll
Only the poison remedies kept them together
For their aching, troubled little girl
Crack strangled her self-esteem and aspirations
Divorce left her an afflicted mother
Her body and mind disintegrated in an endless whirl
Fame and fortune put on hold because of this deadly temptation
Whitney made her confession to all of her admirers
After seven long years had passed
Hopes of resurrection are what inspired her
In rehab her reputation recovered at last
Her drive to succeed remained deep down
And her giving nature never subsided
New releases and infallible supporters raised up the fallen diva
Although she never displayed a frown
Restoring her of glory and warmth is what NAACP decided
And God has granted her some relief from the media
I could definitely use some puncuation advice, and I tend to use weak vocab. Any suggestions?
Here is my end product:
ReplyDeleteOde to a Modern Camelot
A naval hero in World War II,
Commander of the PT-109,
Succeeded in saving much of his crew,
He put his life on the line.
Prominent, wealthy, influential and more,
Learning at his father’s knee,
With ultimate power can come great abuse.
His family heritage is American lore.
Taking what you want no matter the fee,
Always to win and never to lose.
From Senator to President,
Public service was his destiny.
Out into the world he was sent.
A perfect family for all to see,
His Catholic faith was at his core.
Uniting both blacks and whites,
For many causes he always fought.
Tirelessly, he worked for the poor,
NASA, Peace Corps and Civil Rights,
Making a modern Camelot.
His family’s fame came at a cost.
Conspiracy theories abound so,
Norma Jeane’s life was lost.
The truth is - we will never know.
Other women he did claim.
Jackie looked the other way.
An elitist attitude was his flaw.
No one would question him with the Kennedy name.
It was his kids and wife who had to pay.
He thought he was above God’s law.
Self-less but selfish as well,
Wanting opportunities for everyone,
History’s record, time will tell,
If he thought only of himself, bar none.
The tragedy of a life shot down,
An idyllic image shattered,
Intimate details cause shame,
Tears and sadness abound,
JFK’s legacy mattered,
Arlington burns his eternal flame.
Ode to Tiger Woods
ReplyDeleteHe took the game as child prodigy,
Through sweat and tears he mesmerized mankind,
Golf, it seemed, was surely this man’s destiny,
His skill exceeded any you could find,
The power behind each and every swing,
Hercules would have marveled at his drive,
Ambition drove him night and day
To become a golfing king,
His dedication kept his game alive,
Men traveled near and far to watch him play.
To feel as though the world is at your feet,
To numb yourself to any fault or flaw,
He felt as if his game could not be beat,
So easy it was to forget his moral law,
Consumed in himself with no other concerns,
Narcissus was truly his equal,
His golf game made him feel superior,
Yet fate led him through twists and turns,
Blind to the tragic upcoming sequel,
Tiger’s golf game would soon be inferior.
Although true to his game, his eye did stray,
Temptation led him away from his spouse,
His marriage fell into true disarray,
His lust created a broken house,
Like Adam and Eve, his nature was sin,
Poor judgment encompassed his every move,
His golf was perfection, his morals were not,
When trust breaks, trouble sets in,
Brought to light, his fans would soon disapprove,
Tiger’s meltdown would not soon be forgot.
Striving for perfection is a tough task,
Falling short in life is too much to bear,
Living a double life is very hard to mask,
And such large mistakes are beyond repair,
His competitive edge took him quite far,
He was driven to get what he wanted,
Though sometimes his wants made him unfaithful,
They also made him a star,
It was his power and skill that he flaunted,
Yet his lustful ways made him disgraceful.
Ode to the Paper Street Soap Company
ReplyDelete"I want you to hit me as hard as you can."
More profound words have ever been spoken.
With this simple sentence he changed one sad man
so that he was unbreakable, no matter how broken.
He never appealed to the rich or the proud.
Underground fight clubs were just the beginning.
The chaos he caused was for greater good.
He was every no-name in every small town.
At one point is seemed he was actually winning,
like everyone sympathized and understood.
Charisma was key to his rise to power.
Insanity was how he kept people in check.
He maintained his status 'til his final hour
until one strategic shot to the neck.
The primeval roots in each of his drones
reduced them to greatness when controlled by him.
An easy release valve, a life-changing vent;
his Midas touch turned them all into clones.
They did what he wanted at his every whim.
They did what he did wherever he went.
Perfect control was just an illusion,
an excuse for men to live useless lives.
But for him each and every contusion
was something of beauty from whence it derives.
Alas, his weakness was what he did best,
just as Achilles, who died as he fought.
He slighted the one person he needed the most--
the one that he banked on was the one he repressed.
His powerful empire was then overwrought
with disquiet when he became a mere ghost.
His quest was quite simple, yet quite hard to do.
In a sick, twisted way it was fair:
bring everyone down so we all start anew.
No money or government about which to care.
No poverty, no "high class," no rich, and no poor,
Nothing to buy, own, or even desire.
The theory is deep, but deceptively clear.
The plan had an aim; THAT cannot be ignored.
If nothing is left, then we cannot aquire.
If we all have nothing, then nothing's to fear.
Alexis:
ReplyDeleteThe emotion in your poem was great. Even though some people think that his death was his own fault, but you truly make him out to be a tragic hero. Also, your allusions sound very natural and not forced at all.
I used in mine allusions, a paradox, imagery, alliteration, and Keats' rhyme scheme, which I felt enhanced the subject of my poem.
I changed the title of mine to "Ode to Embers of Irenic Hearts."
ReplyDeleteNatalie, I thoroughly enjoyed yours and how it flowed smoothly. In general I liked your word choice although "puppy love" seems to stick out, and throw off the tone a slight bit. Other than that it's very constructed, and you use strong statements.
ReplyDeleteEmily V:
ReplyDeleteI REALLY like your subject for your ode. You picked someone everybody feels some affinity towards, so your poem is just that much more powerful.
Brigitte, I liked the way you use parallelism. It reinforces your points quite well and I feel that someone would use this in a funeral in speaking of their great deeds.
ReplyDeleteBrigitte-- I really liked how you started your poem off with a quote. I think the ending was really profound too. Should the second line say "more profound words have never been spoken"?
ReplyDeleteEmily V:
ReplyDeleteYeah, little typo =].
Brooke:
I don't think your words are weak at all. There are so many ways to see Whitney Houston, but you really make her sound like a tragic hero. I think the only structural thing that needs to be changed is the last line. It needs some kind of conclusion. But other than that, it was lovely =D.
Brooke, your tone is very intense and dark. I never would have thought of Whitney in such a sense had you not addressed her thus. I think you're points are valid most definitely, and I especially like the line "Crack strangled her self-esteem and aspirations." It gives the reader a rather vivid image.
ReplyDeleteode to The King
ReplyDeleteThe mighty King with his good looks and style,
Entwines humor and kindness to his role.
Raised up from low class to walk down star aisle,
He took up the voice that the Muses gave soul,
And his guitar playing was exciting.
With all great fame came money and pleasure,
Charities flourished as flowers in May.
Obsession took over logical and began presiding,
While performance and films became his texture.
Frustration and drive were due to bring pay.
The benevolent singer sparks talent.
Album after album is produced.
Concerts are held and the King is gallant,
While all audiences are being seduced.
The King joins The Duke in his court.
Movies are sold and his image is all around,
To which Aphrodite had given her gift of beauty.
The sailors' ship is his port,
Who travels to all and his presence is unbound.
Performing and her entertaining is his duty.
Obsession clouded the humble victim's reasoning.
His body, like a bridge, needed support,
And pills became his cane and seasoning.
His bridge seemed stronger, as said ina report,
However,in reality,it was dying and becoming weak
His hidden addiction took hold and thrived.
His strive for entertaining led to his demise.
Glory and frustration became bleak,
Life began spiraling down and his body couldn't stay alive.
Death gently took him in size.
Elvis, the King sacrificed his body for the world's pleasure.
His smashing good looks and charm held to the end.
Albums and movies topped charts with static seizure.
Although his creativity clourished, reason could not contend.
The voice of an angel was heard by all.
Frustration came with his fame
And pills befriended the lost KIng.
Addiction took root and led to his fall.
His heart gave way to the murderous flame,
While his voice lives on in a soulful ring.
Here's my comment on Kyley's ode (she hasn't posted it yet =D)
ReplyDeleteYours is so cool =]. You really made it clear how much you admire him. It all flowed nicely, and your allusions were subtle, but once you explained them to me I thought they were quite clever. I especially like the line "This bad boy slipped through the cracks like a bug." Wonderful imagery. I think you need to fix some of your punctuation. I don't think the line "Christopher Wallace, shall never digress" should have a comma in it. Just little nit-picky stuff like that.
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteNew and improved. PLEASE make more suggestions.
ReplyDeleteOde to Detrimental Manipulation
by Brooke Jeffery
Whitney Houston, like the instinctual newborn sparrow,
started young, her preference for God.
Using her musical talents for good wasn’t narrow:
Warring apartheid with Mandela earned a nod.
Striking features and presence would make Venus jealous,
Her personality a considerate match.
A non-profit for homeless and infected children
must have made the philanthropist anxious.
Empowering youth and blacks became her new catch;
For Gulf War soldiers, a reputable siren.
Continuing a legacy of prominent stars,
Her mother, cousins, and godmother, Aretha,
Whitney’s goal to reach platinum was not very far,
Establishing an enduring culture like Siddhartha.
The acclaimed artist accomplished album after album;
Impressive status always follows skill.
Soon she stepped up to the silver screen,
But her prosperity soon left her numb.
Like many, her distressing marriage drove her downhill-
Emotional defilement degraded the queen.
Like the forlorn Medea, she was powerless to love,
Incapable of detaching from Bobby’s control.
His words dismantled her; astray flew the promising dove.
That’s when drugs began to take their toll,
Only the poison remedies kept them together
For their aching, troubled little girl.
Crack strangled her self-esteem and aspirations.
Divorce left her an afflicted mother.
Her body and mind disintegrated in an endless whirl,
Fame and fortune put on hold because of this deadly temptation.
Whitney made her confession to all of her admirers
After seven long years had passed.
Hopes of resurrection inspired her-
In rehab her reputation recovered at last.
Her drive to succeed remained deep down
And her giving nature never subsided.
New releases and infallible supporters raised up the fallen diva,
Although she never displayed a frown.
Restoring her glory and warmth is what NAACP decided,
And God has granted her some relief from the media.
Ode on Disillusion of Power
ReplyDeleteBorn and raised in old North Carolina
By a textile worker and mailwoman
He was a high school football star, hoorah!
Went to Clemson and UNC, smart man,
His degree in textile technology.
It seemed like he Oedipal good luck,
But the worst was yet to occur for him;
He was, for then, getting bang for his buck.
At UNC law, he got his J.D.,
And with his high honors, he was not very dim.
Starting as a sharp, witty attorney,
He won cases for disabled clients,
Such as a kid with cerebral palsy.
After this came political science,
Specifically he ran for U.S. Senate.
For North Carolina, he won an upset.
A politician against poverty,
Who considered Saddam Hussein a threat.
Universal healthcare was also a tenet.
All in all, he fought for equality.
Elizabeth his wife helped him campaign;
For a while, they were happily married,
But tragedy struck-her cancer caused pain.
He showed caring and her burden carried.
Just when people thought he was of great juice,
Some adultery with an aide occurred.
Shattered was his ideal appearance.
However, allegations he deferred.
O! To be loved and degraded like Zeus!
To go from pure to spoiled innocence.
His legacy of policies remains
In conjunction with his awful affair.
His intelligence gave the Senate gains
While his personal life began to tear.
Perhaps pardons for promiscuity
Will present themselves in preeminence.
More likely is that his sins are lasting.
He was evil, yet had magnificence.
Long his fault be seen with acuity,
John Edwards will have guilt everlasting.
This is my ode...I need some suggestions from anyone who is willing to comment-any improvements or thoughts are welcome, no matter how harsh-you all know how good your odes are, now I need help.
Melissa, your stanzas are all one sentence because of all the commas. So just using the first as an example, a period could be placed after line 3, 4, 6, and 9. In order to make better flowing sentences, line 1: took- took to, line 2: add "and" at the beginning. Other than the punctuation, your ode has nice biblical and mythological allusions and good diction.
ReplyDeleteBrooke, your ode read a little like a textbook in the beginning, but then got really good in the last half. I agree with Alexis on the dark nature of your poem, with phrases like emotional defilement and crack strangled. Those words are strong and add a lot to the impact of the ode.
Steven, your beginning was very textbookish as well, but it definitely got better from there. Maybe in the 2nd stanza use terrorists instead of Saddam Hussein. That way it will not be so fact-oriented and will have alliteration. The last two lines of the 3rd stanza are sweet, and the paradox in line 38 is interesting too. line 6: had- he had
Melissa, please disregard my post. I reread Nightingale and it's punctuation is like yours. I'm just confused now..
ReplyDeletePunctuation. Your poem is YOUR poem. The punctuation MUST make sense, relevant to YOUR poem. The model that you chose only guides you with rhyme scheme.
ReplyDeleteMelissa: Think about your poem and what punctuation is necessary to facilitate the message. Own your poem; it belongs to you, not Keats.
ok so here's my ode thanks to all that helped in class today!! Also any new comments would be apperciated. I did my Ode on Anna Nicole Smith
ReplyDeleteOde to Obsession
Blest is she with Aphrodite’s beauty.
She being Rubenesque and fair of hair.
Deep maternal compassion shown in she,
With her bountiful heart bursting with care
Abuse of Smith’s beauty led her astray;
Rapidly racing and rising in fame,
Smith’s kind, loving ways not only bring good
But consume her life--which made her rope fray.
Accusations of greed brought around shame,
And through trials and sorrow she withstood.
Having Marilyn’s charm and bright smile,
Led her to be a model and actress.
As T.V. exposed her life as fragile,
The whirlwind of fame brought her life madness.
Being a mom when a child herself,
Nurturing grew to a full time passion,
But this joyous feeling would be but brief.
The glum heart of Demeter brought sadness
She was the model mom in right fashion
Times were cut short by her engulfing grief.
Though her beauty shown bright for all to see,
Her personal image, obscured by doubt,
Focused on what she believed she should be.
Public opinion changed her throughout.
Bottle of Bacchus led her life to waste.
Her mind stopped flying when numbness snuck in.
The loss of Smith’s love drove her to the brink.
Newborn life accompanied death in haste.
Her lust filled life was one of deadly sin
And soon life was over in one quick blink.
Forever in mind, drugs were a constant,
As blood to the body, drugs fed her mind.
Dependency grew, then she was soon spent
A youthful mother, she was always kind,
There for child so as to never fail--
Like a mother bear, protective and strong
Her deadly, downward demise hastened by
But even to Hades she could not make bail,
To mother and son addiction was long,
For a life cut too short her daughter will cry.
New Ode :) i changed the part about puppy love and fixed a couple of my lines so that they wouldn't jump from one subject to the other.
ReplyDeleteOde to Depression
Heath Ledger virtuous and swift of mind.
Always giving a spectacular performance.
He received awards and gifts of every kind,
Stunning everyone with his brilliance.
His goal was to inspire and entertain,
Fine arts were his passions.
In everything he saw beauty.
A warm smile showed the joy he could not contain,
And it was as if bliss was his sweet addiction,
Sadly it was seized from him so suddenly.
A spotlight is like the sun: a beacon of truth yet blistering, bright.
Healing and destroying man just as Apollo did.
Paparazzi watch for error day and night,
Enjoyment of life these modern day Furies forbid.
All of this stress comes with Hollywood fame,
Photo shoots mask unhappiness and leave it unseen,
And the pressure to be perfect becomes an obsession.
But like Hercules, Heath was controlled by his shame,
Spiraling downward into the ravine,
Allowing his mind and heart weaken.
Intuition and boldness,
And exceptional artistry on stage,
Ill prepared him for the unrelenting darkness,
Inside his terrible and miserable cage.
The doctor prescribed the wrong remedy,
For his Dark Knight induced depression.
Alas! The Moon never granted him a peaceful sleep,
As she did to preserve Edymion's beauty.
A painted smile to hide his desolation,
In the end causing the whole world to wail and weep.
Heath Ledger struggled throughout his life,
With family, personal, and public matters alike.
He eventually succumbed to his own internal strife,
And never recovered from the Furies last strike.
His trademark was total dedication to his movies,
Immersing himself in the life of his character,
And always brave enough to be controversial,
For the roles that he played had many abnormalcies.
Completely consumed, Ledger became the Joker,
And in losing his humanity, depression won Heath's final battle.
I've made several changes and added some devices but i think some parts of my ode still seem like a book report. Can anyone help me?
ReplyDeleteOde to a Modern Camelot
A naval hero in World War II,
Commander of the PT-109,
He succeeded in saving much of his crew,
And put his life on the line.
Prominent, wealthy, influential and more
Learning at his father’s knee.
With ultimate power can come great abuse.
His family heritage is American lore,
Taking what you want no matter the fee.
Always to win and never to lose.
From Senator to President,
Public service was his destiny.
Out into the wild wrongful world he was sent.
A perfect family for all to see,
His Catholic faith was at his core.
Uniting both blacks and whites
For the many causes he always fought.
Tirelessly, he worked for the poor,
NASA, Peace Corps and Civil Rights,
Making a modern Camelot.
His family’s fame and fortune came at a cost.
Conspiracy theories took their toll, so
Norma Jeane’s life was lost.
The truth is - we will never know.
Other women he did claim,
As Jackie looked the other way.
An elitist attitude was his flaw.
No one would question the Kennedy name,
So his kids and wife had to pay.
And just as Tantalus, he believed he was above God’s law.
Self-less but selfish as well,
Wanting opportunities for everyone,
History’s record, time will tell,
If he thought only of himself, bar none.
The tragedy of a life shot down,
An idyllic image shattered,
Intimate details cause shame,
Tears and sadness abound,
JFK’s legacy mattered,
Arlington burns his eternal flame.
Stephen. Watch the book report thing... Also, "kid" is a bit informal for a piece such as this.
ReplyDeleteOde to Pressure
ReplyDeleteAt a young age Britney Spears persevered
And attended a performing arts school.
Her talent and beauty easily appeared
And made hope, dedication and passion her fuel
To success. In the beginning it was pure admiration
That gained her fame. She continued making
Way to Hollywood and attracted much success.
Britney focused and labored to build her foundation.
Always driven toward her goal and taking
Careful steps. Britney is always striving to impress.
Pressure in Hollywood is a definite guarantee.
As a child, the Toxic artist experienced this rough
Hardship. To please everyone would be
Her focus and that would be too impossible. Enough
People pushed her and made her be believe
That she was not perfect. Britney had flaws
Like any other being. She knew the work would
Be tremendous, but in the end she would not be naïve.
With Britney around, people were happy to give applause
And allow her talent to be all that it could.
Hollywood told Britney that more was needed.
The pressure was immense and was not controlled,
Leading to the abuse of Bacchus’ gifts. She succeeded
And kept on with battle. The immense pressure, a lot to withhold,
All of these things Britney experienced and
Soon all spiraled down. Like Zeus, Spears falls to bad temptations.
Like Athena, Britney was Stronger and kept fighting
To keep her place. But again pressure is a lot to withstand.
The numbers on the scale did not meet expectations
Making everything in her stomach uninviting.
Britney continues her journey that started at a young age.
She was taught to have faith and push through
The rough times. Hollywood’s light showed her suffrage
But Britney kept on. No one is perfect who
Lives in this world. Britney accepted this and went
On through life. A shining star she became and
Kept her title though at times it was a battle.
A bird she was and flew above and sent
Her toils down. All sins she buried in sand
And chose to climb back in the saddle.
Thanks for your suggestions, Nicole! They will make my ode a stronger piece of poetry, as it will be truer to the style of Keats. Mrs. Edwards, thanks for your comments; I will make my poem flow better and elevate it to a higher caliber.
ReplyDelete